Smiley! 1.7

I know you all fear it — you’re chatting furiously in AOL’s Pancakes@Home chat room, when you freeze, get that surprised look in your eyes and shout (because you aren’t very good at thinking before you talk) “OMIGOD, I don’t have a smiley indicating pleasure level 8!!!” This is a common problem for thousands of lecherous old men everyday, but thankfully, the solution is here. BITcom Smiley! 1.7 has an extensive database with over 180 ASCII smilies, including =:0)) (pleasure level 8), :-)=) (showing tooths), :} (what?), ?->! (decide now!), (:-) (user without hair), and {:V (sounds like a duck).

Clearly this is a “killer” app. It should not suprise you then that this is in fact the pro version of the freeware freeSmiley. At only $12.00 (516.36 Thai Baht) though, this fun-filled program will provide hours of merriment with its fast (faster than typing!) and easy Smiley Creator feature (some features only available to registered users), and the mysterious “Check” button, that when pressed prints “no description found”.

Jaguar users, never fear, version 1.7 has been freshly compiled and optimized for Mac OS X 10.2.

BITcom Systems, for bravery in the face of dange—no, that isn’t right. For an overall gleeful, yet otherwise useless experience, I award you a 4.8 on the PerversionTracker scale.

Download Smiley!