The AlphaOmega website is truly a thing of beauty. I am humbled.

But if you really want to spice it up, have it translated into Portuguese. You won't understand it (unless you speak Portuguese obviously), but it's much more fun.

Type "i m a ,e" at the right pace and it will say "I am a commie!!!"
GREAT APP.
*****
A+++++ seller.

Like Brian, I started playing Stupid Spelling Tricks(tm) and did find it fun, for two seconds.
"ruez"?
"dduzu"?
"24t nt42 unme nmenu"...

Not to mention the fact that '`' sounds like heartburn medication...
And that the sound of typing "..." would be great in the next production of "Echo of the Tampax Era"...

Here I sit upon my bed,
A raven raving in my head,
And then it hits me -- frig me dead!
The keyboard. It's the keyboard.

I felt I had to do a pee.
My keyboard countered -- so did he!
I tried to break him 'pon my knee.
The keyboard. It's the keyboard.

So now my iMac lies asunder,
Midst the broken glass and chunder
While my bowels growl and thunder ...
The keyboard. It's the keyboard.

And still the gibber gibbers on,
Despite the iMac being gone.
This software is a frigging con!
The keyboard. It's the keyboard.

This app is dangerous. While I was typing "pretty purple puppies play", it kept telling me to "pee, pee, pee, pee, pee, pee, pee, pee". So I did. Who's going to pay to clean my chair?

It's a psi and is pronounced "Sigh"

http://www.dictionaraoke.org/

And--You... Thought... Voicemail... Was... Bad!

This might seem like a stupid question, but what does this have to do with Austrailian Barbecue?

I'm so very glad you asked that question, Willie Bee (and even managed use correct spelling and punctuation).

I think the simple answer is that the author of the software should have his tender buttocks filleted, marinated in a delightful blend of honey, garlic and soy sauce for at least two hours (but preferably overnight), and then grilled on a barbie until it curls up, blackens, bursts into flame, and ultimately drifts away in the breeze, a small puff of ash -- with much the same value as his dross application.

Alternatively, he could serve two to five in a minimum-security facility for attempting to pervert the course of intelligence.

Yours sincerely
Mrs Eunice McGilvray, Celebrity Chef, Euabalong CWA*

NOTE: * Country Women's Association

Actually the software will be great for those of us that have to enter data. The app will help to reduce entry errors but will probably drive me crazy.

s.

Er.. could be useful for learning touch-typists; for children learning what the keys are; for people adjusting to a foreign keyboard (assuming it does the key mapping for a foreign keyboard..) A pity to really not pause a bit to think. There's much worse stuff out there.

Charles, Charles, Charles. I think you've mistaken this for a serious place of review. It's a pisstake, old bean. If you take off all your clothes, bend over and look right up your bum, I think you might find a sense of humour up there somewhere. Probably between the internal haemorrhoids and that nasty stress-related ulcer.

The world could be such a happy place if we all just learnt to laugh at bottoms. And farts.

Your assignment, Charles, is to look up the following words in a dictionary: inane; puerile; childish; fun; antidisestablishmentarianism. (OK, so the last one has nothing to do with anything, but I just like to practise spelling it now and again.)

Uh oh! Forgot to sign my previous effort. Sorry, Charles. I'm not one for anonymous attacks, and I genuinely apologise for not putting my name to it.

The rest of it, though ...