War is not healthy for fancy chickens and other living things.
Sponsored by
L337.com
In order to show our commitment to our dozens of loyal readers, we have decided to conduct the occasional opinion poll to make you feel — how shall we put this? — empowered, included, part of the process. Your opinion matters to us. YOU matter to us.
Ha, ha! We really had you going for a second there, didn’t we?
Posted by jan at June 14, 2003 02:57 PM | TrackBackFirst Post!
Generated automatically by First Post Pro, available at http://www.mcoffey.com/projects/fpp
Losers! You use an inferior product like MicroShit Excel to produce a pie like this! How dare you! I DEMAND this to be redone as a beautifull rendered Keynote variant!!!
Gosh..... idiots.... I won't let you throw me a pie like that in the face! It better be an Apple pie instead of a louzy shitty whiped cream pie!!!!
Posted by: KOOL on June 14, 2003 05:56 PMHey, my response DOES MATTER. I believe I am responsible for swaying public opinion about this site. If not for bringing to the attentions of the CIA through my constant mentions of the JFK conspiracy. See, I DO make a difference. *flees in terror seeing men in suits with earpieces approach*
Posted by: Laemkral on June 14, 2003 06:26 PMThat pie chart was clearly drawn by a flatulent bandicoot who spent 37 seconds flinging varicolored, wedge-shaped poop at Jan's computer screen.
You hate me. Will I marry you?
Posted by: Gidget on June 14, 2003 06:31 PMMy apologies to all of you who attempted to download FPP earlier. The first post slipped out before the product. It is now available at the given URL.
Posted by: Mike on June 14, 2003 06:41 PMYou know, with the simple addition of a small disc of palladium, this diagram would appear to be a schematic for the triggering mechanism of a plutonium fission weapon.
Well, it does! Pppffft to you, too!
you"ve done it again, miKe coffey, ro should I s4y irts done you!???!?!?!?? THE L;AST SHALL B3 FIRST WHEN THE APOCALYPSE COMEs I O2WN JO0!!!!!!!!!!!!!111~~~
Posted by: naomi [via FPP - hacker dialect] on June 14, 2003 07:29 PMI really think the use of a pie chart is a really good idea since most PvT readers can't read.
Psssst...since they can't read, don't tell them I said this.
Posted by: Norm O. Tidwell on June 14, 2003 07:54 PMStop stealing my shtick, Naomi!
Posted by: Linda Blair on June 14, 2003 08:02 PMWell, my oh my. I never dreamed that telepathic marketers had such abilities. Yes, I did go to the mixer with those very nice people from the Crazy Apple Rumors Site. And doing the Bunny Hop was Johnny's idea, he is such a scamp! We danced all night, and then, he insisted that he help me back to the trailer court, even though the walker barely fit on the back of his Vespa. At first I resisted his sly advances, but secretly I always knew that 'Black Adder' would soon be mine.
Posted by: Norma O. Tidwell on June 14, 2003 09:15 PMClandestine paranormal pollsters are not welcome in my mind, and I shall thank you to stop tapping my subconscious while I sleep.
Belvedere, bring me my lead topee! And fetch my antique copy of the 45 rpm vinyl single of "Everyone's a Winner" by Hot Chocolate! Once that tune starts going around in my head, no one will be able to stand to contact me telepathically!
Posted by: aussie boy on June 14, 2003 09:32 PMFustPostPro is th' sucks meow -- aroun' hyar we jest call it Sucksy McStubbs. Eff'n it wasn't so obviously craf'ed fo' PervahshunTracker, it might git reviewed hyar. As it is, it will probably only git a mockin' post, wif th' ratin' wifheld, jest t'annoy th' autho'. Did ah menshun how much it sucks?
No doubt them sharps in th' PvT office will jump on this hyar oppo'tunity t'git in a few extry mocks. Nyah nyah nyah! Fry mah hide! Yo' suck FPP! Fry mah hide!
Posted by: Sucksy McStubbs on June 14, 2003 09:51 PMWhy, I wouldn't want FPP to be reviewed here! This is obviously an effort to create a fine software product, not a PvT candidate. I'm surprised that wasn't obvious.
Posted by: Mike on June 14, 2003 10:18 PMPerversiontracker = 3 lbs. happiness per session.
Litterally.
Three actual, solid pounds.
Incredible, isn't it?
Yet somehow, that's what is is, three physical cubic pounds.
Deleriously though, you guys are the best!
Posted by: Ampule Geronimer on June 14, 2003 10:18 PMHow come no one ever asks me for my opinion? Don't you guys love me any more? I feel so lonely and I need therapy. I want my own slice on the pie chart and I am going to clinch my sphincter as tight as a drum until I get my own slice on the pie chart! You hear me, I'll do it! To motivate you guys, I am going to eat several polish sausages to exasperate the situation. I warn you, time is running out before I explode.
Posted by: Norm O. Tidwell on June 14, 2003 11:37 PMSettle, Norm, me old pomegranate milkshake! You were consulted, but in your unconscious mind. What? Excuse me for a moment, Norm ...
[SFX: mutter, mutter, mutter]
Ah, Belvedere tells me that you were out of your mind at the time. No *wonder* you didn't feel the ethereal tentacles as they reached across your synapses!
Posted by: aussie boy on June 15, 2003 12:22 AMSettle-a, Nurm, me-a oold pumegrunete-a meelksheke-a! Yuoo vere-a cunsoolted, boot in yuoor uncunsceeuoos meend. Bork bork bork! Vhet? Ixcoose-a me-a fur a mument, Nurm
[SFX: mootter, mootter, mootter]
Eh, Belfedere-a tells me-a thet yuoo vere-a oooot ooff yuoor meend et zee teeme-a. Nu *vunder* yuoo deednt feel zee izeereel tentecles es zeey reeched ecruss yuoor synepses!
Posted by: Swedish Chef on June 15, 2003 12:28 AMSettle-a, Nurm, me-a oold pumegrunete-a meelksheke-a! Yuoo vere-a cunsoolted, boot in yuoor uncunsceeuoos meend. Bork bork bork! Vhet? Ixcoose-a me-a fur a mument, Nurm
[SFX: mootter, mootter, mootter]
Eh, Belfedere-a tells me-a thet yuoo vere-a oooot ooff yuoor meend et zee teeme-a. Nu *vunder* yuoo deednt feel zee izeereel tentecles es zeey reeched ecruss yuoor synepses!
Posted by: Swedish Chef on June 15, 2003 12:34 AMI repent! Never again shall I write tools to harass innocent PvT users.
Posted by: Mike on June 15, 2003 12:52 AMChef, you twinkle-toed twat, it wasn't funny the first time ... OK, it made me smile a bit. But the second time? Jeeeeez!
Posted by: aussie boy on June 15, 2003 02:35 AMI think it would have been significantly improved by using the same shade of aqua blue for all slices.
Posted by: podperson on June 16, 2003 07:17 PMI agree with podperson. Or how about brushed-metal slices? There's steel, copper, brass ...
Posted by: aussie boy on June 16, 2003 10:40 PMDid you know that this site is a googlewhack?
Posted by: Steve on July 20, 2004 03:04 AM