War is not healthy for fancy chickens and other living things.
Sponsored by
L337.com
“TennisAce is an application which lets you track your performance against any number of players. Head-to-Head statistics can be viewed and fun awards can be presented to your partners.”
As the alacritous reader may have guessed, TennisAce is yet another example of a FileMaker Pro database passed off as a real application. Despite this handicap, TennisAce’s indefatigable author, Stefan Schramm, attempts to compensate by spicing up the interface with “fun” shading. In the accompanying screenshot, we can observe the following control colors:
With all this spectral excitement, one almost forgets that recording tennis game statistics is approximately as painful as having one’s head beset by a 3/4 size clavichord swung at high velocity by a 300-foot gantry crane. But do not let the rough talk of this humble software-stevedore deter you from downloading this bloated refuse and immediately employing it to print “fun awards” to present to your tennis partners:
Stefan Schramm, our boredom with tennis in general could not be overcome by your special knack for gradient creation. Not helping matters, TennisAce’s outrageous $25 price (154,972.50 Paraguayan Guarani) is pure thievery. As such, we feel justified in supplying you with an 8.9, complete with protective carrying case and commemorative certificate.
Posted by ladd at August 25, 2003 10:56 PM | TrackBackPretty colors + bad attempt at metal = AUGH! OH GOD! MUST GOUGE EYES!
But seriously, its evil. Not pure evil, more along the lines of 71% evil, and some of that was once concentrate so you know the quality is degraded.
I once had to use FileMaker, and lets just say we will never mention it again except to say now THAT was some 99% pure evil.
It's more like the Diet Coke of Evil
Posted by: Dr. Evil on August 26, 2003 09:01 AMIt's Dr. Evil's son, Scotty Evil
Posted by: Robo on August 26, 2003 09:56 AMLadd, where you refer to "alacritous" reader, do you mean alacrious reader, as in joyous, active or lively reader? I kinda get that way after reading some of the reviews on PVT. Get a dictionary as well as a thesaurus!
Left Field:
Methinks it is thee who must needs refer to a dictionary. A quick perusal of said tome would inform you that alacritous is indeed a word.
Now go away, or I shall taunt thee a second time!
Posted by: MacFanaticus on August 26, 2003 02:37 PMand, shockingly, they mean similar things!
alacrious
\A*lac"ri*ous\, a. [L. alacer, alacris.] Brisk; joyously active; lively.
a·lac·ri·ty ( P ) Pronunciation Key (-lkr-t)
n.
Cheerful willingness; eagerness.
Speed or quickness; celerity
(see, alacritous is the adjective form of alacrity)
here: alacritous
if this doesn't support html then that's going to look mighty stupid.
Ah.... more rixster bashing.
Does this remind anyone else of tormenting a terrier with a stick.
Poke the little doggie make him bark.
Posted by: rubberchicken on August 26, 2003 05:02 PMAnd rubberchicken continues the rixster bashing by comparing him to a terrier. You should be glad there's not a GDC (Global Dog Conspiracy), or else you'd have terriers nipping at you heels for comparing rixster to them.
And don't even get me started on the GCC (Global Cat Conspiracy).
Posted by: U. D. Mann on August 26, 2003 06:23 PMIf rixter was a chicken would he be foul?
I do like terriers so perhaps I am being a little harsh.
Posted by: rubberchicken on August 26, 2003 10:40 PMwaste r waste i waste x waste s waste t waste e waste r waste s waste u waste x waste x waste o waste r waste z waste z waste
www.commentspacewasterpro.com/hotnews
Posted by: Comment Space Waster Pro™ 1.0.1 on August 27, 2003 07:17 AMTennisAche my ass!
Posted by: Double Worsted on August 29, 2003 07:19 PM